The Journey

"The end of religion is the beginning of spirituality; the end of spirituality is the beginning of Reality, and the end of Reality is the real Bliss. When that too is gone, we have reached the destination. That is the highest mark, which is almost inexpressible in words."

Taken from the book "Complete Works of Ram Chandra, Vol. 1 (1st Indian edn., 1989)", Chapter "Reality – Its Static and Dynamic Aspects", pg. 306, by Babuji Maharaj"

My sister Pratibha Kang, shared these words with me right when I was taking stock of my journey...........As I read them, I understood that I am at the end of spirituality and beginning of reality phase.........because I often find the 'in-your-face spiritual jargon' too cliched and hollow....More and more I resonate with those people who LIVE their  inner Truth in their day-to-day lives (they may or may not call themselves spiritual)....I often use the phrase, 'Let's get real.' (especially with my 'spiritual' friends, who continue to reside in astral worlds)  It is interesting to note that some great master had looked at The Journey and categorized it in this manner........:)

The Universe always sends us the missing pieces of the jig-saw-puzzle called The Journey of Life....

Fear

Most of us (especially mothers) feel anxious when our kids begin to drive on our ‘killer’ roads, sharing the precious space with speeding drivers on cell-phones. We see or hear of so many accidents that we feel our fears are justified. But are do actually doing a dis-service to our children by fearing/ worrying/ nagging/ being lovingly overprotective?

While it is natural to want to protect our children from any danger coming from outside or from within them, we must remember that humans do not learn to take responsibility for their actions unless they are given the opportunity to be responsible. All sentient beings (including humans) are naturally grounded in the energy of self-preservation (the survival instinct), and we must trust this energy in our children.
We do great dis-service when we transfer our own fears to our children; telling them that they have something to fear about, regardless of how prepared they might be! When children sense our fears, the fears become more real to them and they begin to fear as well. This added energy calls our fears into being and more often than not becomes a cause for accidents. Is that what we truly want?

In a world where potential dangers (traffic, crazy fellow beings, vagaries of nature etc) lurk around every corner, it is good to say (and believe), “All is well in my world.” With this thought in mind we can allow our children to make their choices and follow their heart- and this applies not only to driving but life itself.

Let us not let our fears arouse our children’s fears……..:))

Remember- Whenever we feel fearful about something, it is an indication that our soul wants us to understand some things.

The child that you were

Someone asked me yesterday, "Would the child that you were be proud of the woman that you are?" I said, "That's a beautiful question! I believe that the child that I was would be very proud of the woman I am."....She smiled and said, "How many persons can honestly say this?" I replied, "I don't know. Not many I guess; but I am certain about the feelings and thoughts of the child that I was (have done a lot of inner-child work and understand her completely by now). Even the teenager that I was, or the young adult that I was, or the woman that I was until yesterday, would be proud of the woman that I am today! There is no doubt in my mind/ heart about that."

What say you? Would the child that you were be proud of the wo/man that you are? Yes, No, May be, Perhaps......................:)))))

Attitude

"We awaken in others the same attitude of mind we hold towards them."

– Elbert Hubbard

What a beautiful saying and so very true! When I think of someone as stubborn, s/he shows a stubborn attitude towards me. When I think of someone as intelligent, his/ her intelligence gets expressed in my presence. When I think of someone as lazy, that person reveals laziness of mind and body. 

I awaken in others, what I think about them.....and so do you! So, the next time you either praise or criticize someone's behaviour, know that you have awakened it in him/ her/ them, by your perceived opinion of that person (or a certain type of people).

For example, when we think that Indians will always litter, they do!! When we think that politicians/ bureaucrats/ police officials are usually corrupt, they are!! When we think that corporate practices are mostly unethical, they are!!

If we wish to change the world, we have to change our attitude towards it!! and our attitudes get affected by what we think/ read/ write/ speak...:))

-- 

Happy Marriage

What is your secret of happy marriage?

In our case, it is knowing, remembering and if need be, reminding the other that our views/ likings/ dislikings/ preferences/ moods/ perspectives may differ from time to time but we remain on the same side....with our common love for love, peace, harmony, mutual growth and loving communication.......:)

After 30 years of togetherness we both enjoy each other's company the most.........:))

Third-Eye Experiences

Why do we give more importance to our 'Third Eye' experiences over our 'two-eyes' experiences? Is it because those experiences make us feel special, 'holier-than- some others'? Is it an escape into the world we have all come from (home sickness)? Every one can have those experiences just as everyone can have open-eye experiences? It is just a matter of tuning into a certain frequency.....and watching a certain channel...:)

Earlier I used to feel in awe of such experiences and the ones who experienced them...Today, I feel in awe of (admire) those people who are fully grounded in their Earth experience........EXPRESSING their divinity through their humanity (and not through some lofty glimpses of the astral world) .......Such people (and there are far more than I can count) are my heroes...my role models...♥

A Competitive Mindset

Speaking of competition, I realize that the very ill of ‘not good enough’ has its root in a world obsessed with competition.

Right from the time we are born, our competition begins. Our various growth milestones (which are so very individual) such as when we begin to teeth/ sit/ crawl/ stand/ walk/ speak etc become the topic of ‘one-up-wo-man-ship’ among relatives, colleagues and neighbors. Parents speak proudly about the early bloomers (taking full credit for the little blighter’s performance) while blame the genes (taken from a particular side of the family) as the culprit for late milestones. The poor kid, s/he is not even aware of the competitive spirit that gets aroused by such a simple thing whether s/he sleeps through the night or wakes up many times.

(No, wait a minute, that’s not true! We think that the infant is not aware of what is going on, but the energy of our competitive thoughts filters through our words and affects the baby- even in its sleep!)

From there on, the competition continues in many subtle and not-so-subtle ways. By the time a child joins the primary school, s/he is already stamped with ‘NOT GOOD ENOUGH’, because there has to be some area in which we find ourselves ‘not up to the mark’ vis-à-vis someone else. Even if we excel in a certain area, we can’t be the best in everything. And that brings us to our obsession with being an ‘ALL ROUNDER’. Every parent (whether they have achieved anything themselves or not) (especially if they haven’t achieved much and feel ‘not good enough' themselves) wants their child to be an all-rounder. And that’s an absolute impossibility, because NO ONE is designed to be an all-rounder. We can only be ‘Andhon mein Kana Raja’- ‘the one-eyed king among the blind’.

And we all want to be that- one-eyed king, even when we have the potential of seeing with not only our two physical eyes, but even a meta-physical third eye as well! What a waste of our potential!!

The genesis of this ubiquitous competition lies in our faulty thought that THERE ISN’T ENOUGH……there isn’t enough money, there isn’t enough time, there aren’t enough seats for study, there aren’t enough jobs, and there aren’t enough resources! Those who run faster than the rest, get there to lay their hands on as much as they can grab.

But wait a minute a minute! Where are we running off to? Who cares? All we know is that we need to run and grab (whatever it is that we want to grab) before someone else does, before it gets over/ finishes. And thus begins the rat race, which is another name for mindlessly going around in circles, not knowing where we are headed! And someone has very rightly said, even when we win the race, we remain a rat!!

What if we were to believe that we can all be/ do/ have what we desire from deep within? That there is no need to run, as nothing is running away from us. That we can simply enjoy our life journey from day one, being who we are, and not feeling guilty about it.

What if we grew up believing that we are lovable as we are, with our likes, dislikes, talents, desires, aptitudes, attitudes, vulnerabilities, imperfections? That we don’t need to prove anything to anyone anytime. That we can rejoice in our uniqueness.

What if we were sure that we don’t need to compete with anyone for anything? That our parents’ love was a given, that good education was a given, that earning a livelihood was a given, that a good, loving lovable home life was a given.

What if we completely believed that we don’t need to impress anyone with clever words, good looks, smart credentials, loads of money, fancy gadgets, big homes, yachts, private jets etc?

What if our loving essence shone through us at all times, dazzling us with our inherent goodness, kindness, compassion, care, and brotherhood?

What if we begin to let go of our competitiveness, small mindedness, selfishness, and grabbing- hogging - seeking attention mentality?

What if we begin to feel ‘ENOUGH’? I am enough. I have enough. There is enough to go around. There is enough where this comes from. The Source is infinite. Our potential is infinite. Resources are infinite; when one resource gets exhausted, we get creative and find new/ different resources. That is how new discoveries/ inventions are made, new jobs are created, new subjects are studied.

This is an ever-renewing, ever-evolving, ever-growing universe. We are ever-renewing, ever-evolving, ever-growing beings!
Where is the doubt that the universe has ENOUGH for all our needs? But there is certainly a doubt whether it has enough for even a few people’s greed!! And the greed originates in competition!!

It is time we did away with competition in any form; and the place to begin with, as always is, WITHIN US…:)

Competition in Families

Since we grow up in an environment of competition, we carry this competitive spirit into our family lives too (how can that not be). Hence, siblings compete with each other (some parents actually encourage it) and even spouses compete with each other (who do the children love more).

We don't even hide our proclivity for competition and comparison by blatantly asking small innocent children, 'Who loves you more? Papa or Mama? Who do you love more? etc' and depending upon the child's answer (the smarter ones always say 'both' but the adults are not satisfied with such 'spoil-sport' politically correct answers) one parent would chime in, 'Who gets chocolates/ ice-cream/ video-games etc for you?" making the child feel that all the 'goodies' (god forbid) come with a price- you HAVE TO like the one who gets you more 'stuff'.

This is just a small example, I can give many more (and even if I don't, each one of you have your own unique ones to look into). But the fact remains that 'competition' between family members is the cause of all our relational/ societal issues. and each one of us is responsible for sowing this seed in our family. (we may mask this 'competitive spirit' well, but this is the one which creates fodder for all family gossip).

In my practice as a life coach (such coaches are needed because of the mess we ourselves have created), I come across many cases of marital discord; and the root cause of all discords remains just one- yes, the ubiquitous competition. It may show up in different forms/ avatars; but there is no running away from it. 

One very important step in coaching is letting a couple see that they are both on the same side. They want the same things for themselves and their children. I have seen that the moment this thought finds root, a break-through happens. The competition gets demolished. Otherwise, every well-meaning conversation/ observation ends up in perceived fault-finding, judgment, criticism etc. and provokes a befitting retort! (ending the communication in hurt/ sulk/ anger)

And how can that not be? This is exactly what we do in other areas of our life. We are always in a competitive mode. 

The concept of win-win appeals to me a great deal because it ensures a win for all....and that's what we all are. We are all winners. There are no losers here. The only loser is -Competition; and it's high time it lost! 

The game is up!

 

Competitive World...Really??

I was reading Gesu Aftab's blog.......and this particular one resonated deeply. Thank you Gesu for your evocative thoughts. I have taken the liberty of adding my own twist to it.......:)))

.......We have designed an education system which teaches us to compete. We are all asked to develop an ‘urge to win’. If you are not interested or are shy, you have to be 'shaped' to win (continuously making you feel that you are not good enough). We applaud those who are ‘born to win’. All examinations, tests, entrances, sports; most activities focus upon a lot of people participating and a single person winning (or in some cases a group/ few lucky ones winning). There is only one ‘first’ (obviously). (none of us question the validity of such competition; in fact we are all a party to it)

During our most impressionable age (as a child/ teenager/young adult), we are taught to complete and win. But the most hilarious part is that when we grow up and join the work-force (in corporate, government bodies, NGOs etc) organizations have to create special departments and hire specialists to train people into ‘team work’. People are taken through various psychological exercises to build trust in others, work together, communicate clearly, have fun while working, take it easy, laugh, have passion, show compassion, be creative, and allow healthy exchange of ideas. Really!!!!! (we expect the same in families too!)

Weren’t we exactly there when we were kids? Didn’t we play for hours with our friends without competition, having fun, being a team, working together? What a colossal waste of human energy and mental health!

With an education (societal) system like that how many of us can claim to be sane?? What are we doing to change those systems which have outlived their utility? How are we contributing in creating a saner world??

Difficult questions but a simple answer---------WE MUST BE THE CHANGE WE WANT TO SEE IN THE WORLD.........The Father (as always) got it right!!

Point of View

NO ONE can see anything from the same point of view, as I see it....Why am I so certain about it? Because I know that no one can stand on the same point where I am standing, at least not while I am standing there....:) We are not on the same point and can never be on the 'same' point....Similar yes, but not the same!!! Because when you come to the same point, I would have moved from there and vice-versa......

This is what makes our simple life complex....We can never COMPLETELY understand the other person's point of view, it is not possible. We can at best come 'close' to understanding it...BUT what we can easily do is ACCEPT that everyone's point of view is valid for that person. Because it always is.....(this is one of the absolute truths) EVERYONE'S POINT OF VIEW IS ALWAYS VALID FOR THAT PERSON- but may not be so for another person!

Whatever we observe/ believe/ understand/ see is valid from our point of view in that moment....the moment we move from that point our view changes and the new view becomes valid for us. That's so simple to understand, UNLESS we become adamant that the view that I am seeing from my point is the ONLY VIEW and every one must see it the way I am seeing it.

This reminds me of our road journeys, when we stop to admire the view, but even when we stand on the same strip of land, different things attract us....and depending upon our respective position our view is slightly different...small children always see different things because they are shorter (closer to the ground) than us........

All our problems (personal, family, societal, world) emanate from the very fact that we not only don't honour the other person's point of view, but also remain convinced that his/ her point of view is wrong. We get irritated, 'Why can't s/he see what I can see so clearly?' well, s/he can't see what you are seeing, because s/he doesn't have the same point of view. Their view is different from yours and you too can't see their point of view......:))

Today, let us make this commitment to ourselves (for our own peace) that while expressing our own point of view (which we have the right to express), we will restrain from judging another person's point of view (which we have no right to do in the first place- it is trespassing). If we don't like the other person's point of view, the least we can do is say, 'I don't agree with what you are saying, but that's alright. We are different people, with different upbringing, different life-experiences, different challenges etc. etc.'.........Let us honour our differences amicably. Let us learn to disagree without being disagreeable!

Pain

Whenever we experience pain (whether physical or emotional), it tells us how other beings experience pain. It also tells us that sometimes we contribute to others’ pain (human, animal, plants, mineral), just as others (people, animals, bacteria, virus, fungi, chemicals etc) contribute to our pain. At such times, it is good to ask for forgiveness and offer forgiveness to the collective-consciousness.

Pain is never ‘personal’, though it may seem so. Our pain is just a small trailer of what beings do to each other. It is a sentient experience; given to us to teach us compassion.

Are we learning this lesson from our pain? Or are we waiting for a bigger dose? The choice, as always, rests with us…….:)

Freedom

“You’re not free until you have nothing to prove and no need to impress anybody.” Joyce Meyer

Looking at ‘freedom’ with this definition in mind, almost all of us are not ‘free’; I certainly am not. Not so far....:)

What is it that I have to prove to myself and the world?
Worthiness? Usefulness?

Who do I need to impress with my knowledge, wisdom, lifestyle choices etc? Myself? My family? Friends? Strangers? Those who don’t know me don’t care one way or the other…and those who do, they already do….:))) So, what’s the big deal?

Intellectually I understand that my very being on this planet is proof enough that I am worthy of love, care, compassion, appreciation etc. I am here because this is where I am supposed to be right now. My being here itself is a proof of my usefulness in this moment, in the here and now. My unique energy signature plays an important role in ALL THAT IS and ISN’T….whether I know it or not, whether I make an extra effort or not………..:)

However, this intellectual understanding hasn’t yet translated into my core wisdom. It is yet to be digested and assimilated completely…..

What if I say, it is done…….I AM free? Will I be truly free then? Do I have enough faith and TRUST? Questions sometimes have clear answers and sometimes don’t!!

But I believe that when the seed is sown and nurtured, the plant will definitely see the light of the day!!

I already feel FREE-er! And so it is!

Personal Power

"Each one of us is born with a sacred contract to learn to use our personal power responsibly, wisely and lovingly"........Carolyn Myss

But before we learn to USE our Personal Power, we need to become aware of our personal power and acknowledge it. We also need to take it back from those (parents, spouse, children, teachers, institutions, society, leaders, businesses, gurus, friends etc) who we have handed it over to.

How do we determine if we have handed over our personal power? and to whom?

There is a very simple test. Think of all that you are afraid of, people you are fearful of, and whatever/ whoever stops you from following your heart.........those are the ones you have handed over your personal power to!!!!

When I take this test, I realize that my power has been scattered in many directions......and while de-centralization of power works well within a democracy (with the best interest of people at heart), our Personal Power must remain centered within us.

However, my personal experience has also taught me that once I begin to use my personal power (whatever little remains within me) responsibly, wisely and lovingly, more and more gets added to it.

Yes, just as my fears made me give my power away, without my conscious realization or consent; responsible, wise and loving use of my power makes me take it back from the world, without any conscious effort, and without their consent!

When I look at my fears, face to face, asking myself, 'What is the max that will happen if I refuse to give my power away, if I stay firm on my ground, if I simply follow my heart, if I remain true to myself, if I refuse to follow the herd, if I trust everyone, if I accept everything as it is, if I bare my vulnerability'; well, NOTHING happens!!!

Yes, that is the anti-climax. When we are ready for the worst, the worst can't face us..............That is when everything becomes effortless........and beautiful!!! Only because we begin to SEE beauty in everything!! and as they say, 'A thing of beauty is a joy forever.'

That is the by-product of using our Personal Power responsibly, wisely and lovingly in all areas of our life.

Heaven on Earth

Our ego-personality is the 'Outer-Self'; while Consciousness/ Spirit is the 'Inner-Self'.......The Residing Deity! 

When we use expressions like 'Higher'-self, we automatically condemn a part of our 'self' to be the 'Lower'-self! and since we humans dwell in duality and judgment; one part of our 'self' becomes better (holier) than the other. 

So much so, that we begin to (and continue to) 'glorify/ deify' one part at the cost of the other; and conversely, 'vilify' (make villain out of) the other part!

Can you imagine the plight of the part being vilified? Can you imagine the 'holier-than-thou' attitude of the one being glorified?

Do you see this game being played in all areas of our life? We glorify/ vilify professions/ inclinations/ institutions/ talents/ tendencies/ opinions/ complexions/ looks/ races/sexes/ animals/ flowers/ plants/ people/ parts of our own personality etc. etc. etc.

What if we stop playing this game? What if we start treating everyone as equal?

Can we begin with ourselves? Can we stop vilifying our ego-personality? Can we stop glorifying our Higher Self? Can we accord them equal status?

If we can do that, we can create Heaven on Earth...........♥

Glorious and Perfect

We ARE glorious and perfect...........:) This is not an ego issue, because in our glory and perfection we are all alike. None of us is more glorious or more perfect than another....

It is our ego-personality signature which makes us unique/ different/ separate from the other. That's why the ancients talked about 'transcending' the ego in order to understand that our ego-personality is an 'individuated' expression of the ONE glorious and perfect Spirit/ Consciousness, which resides in all beings!

However, we need to remember that the ego-personality didn't 'choose' itself- The glorious and perfect Spirit chose the ego-personality! And why did it do so? Why does it continue to do so? There must be SOME reason for the glorious/ perfect spirit to choose imperfect ego-personalities to 'house' itself!!!

Is it playing 'Hide and Seek'? Perhaps it is!

Why do WE play 'hide and seek'? To have fun? To enjoy ourselves? To break the monotony? To amuse our children?

Perhaps the glorious and perfect Spirit/ Consciousness/ Father-Mother God/ ALL THAT IS/ I AM Presence is also playing this game simply to have fun, enjoy itself, break the monotony, and amuse his/ her children-The Creation!

And what happens when we have fun and amuse ourselves?

As a by-product of having fun, our vibrations are raised, our personal (and collective) energy field gets expanded and The Consciousness expands too! What a win-win story! Win for the ego-personality and win for The Spirit!! Wow!

Don't parents usually wish win-win for both; the children and the parents?

Is it possible that Father- Mother God too want Win-Win for all of Creation??

I believe so! and SO IT IS!!!

Put On Your Dancing Shoes

Many of you would have observed that if we sit/ lie down without any movement whatsoever (as in meditation/ deep sleep) our body becomes very stiff. So much so that at times it becomes very difficult and pretty painful to dis-entangle our limbs. The rigor-mortis that sets in after death is primarily because of a total lack of movement. 

Having understood (and experienced) that, it would be sensible to surmise that all body 'stiffness' can be relieved by movement! And what kind of movement is the MOST enjoyable not just for our body but also for our mind/ soul/ spirit (something that raises our spirits) and which can be easily done either in the privacy of our homes or in full public view...........at any time of the day or night.....Yes Sir, you got it right!! It is DANCING!

What stops us from dancing everyday? It is not only good for our muscles, joints, mood etc but also helps us reduce extra-body weight..........That too in such a fun way!!!

Today onward I have decided to move and shake, every day, day after day, and have a ball!!! Are you game too?? 

Food For Thought

Whether we like it or not, food remains the central core of our existence in this world. Most of our precious life-energies are used in procuring (which includes working to earn money to procure food), storing, preparing, consuming, digesting, assimilating, and eliminating food. Yes, what we eliminate becomes food for someone else. In fact, it amuses me no end how we humans- who think no end of themselves- are being used as ‘food-processing’ units by some worms, whom we call the lowliest of the lowlies!!

Those dung-eating worms must be having the last laugh, because no human can ever stop working for them. We HAVE to produce their food. We are designed for that. And we do this job for free; only to ensure our own survival! How interesting!!

Did someone say there are no free lunches (or breakfast or dinner)? Ask the worms. They are indeed smarter than we humans are.....:))

Now, the question arises that if God/ the Creator has taken such great care to produce non-stop food for these so-called scum-bugs........how about us- the humans- who are made in HIS own image? Won't our father/mother God- The Creator have thought of our sustenance?

Does it make any sense that the most intelligent of all species on Earth- the Divine child himself- is simply running around in circles, wasting the precious life-energy not in any creative pursuit (something befitting his stature) but in worrying about filling his stomach?????

We only have to remind ourselves that we are an INTEGRAL part of God's creation- The Nature- and The Nature provides for everyone's nutritional needs in plenty.

Who will call us 'intelligent' if we threaten/ destroy/ dwindle our own Source of Nourishment???? Will a dung-worm do that? Will it kill/ infect/ destroy a human (his food-producing machine)? NO............because it BELIEVES in Live and Let Live.........Something that each one of us needs to learn, in order to access Universal Abundance...........:)))

Food for Thought...♥

Soul Wounds

Soul wounds are our emotional currency that we either use to create more joy, peace and love in our lives, or more pain and limitation. 

These wounds and their dense emotional energy is like a backpack on our back, which we need to put down in order to evolve.......

In computer jargon, these wounds are like virus attack on our software/ hardware.......and we need to not only clean out our files but also install anti-virus protection....:)

Tuning-Fork Effect

Every thought and emotion that I experience is not really ‘mine’…It simply exists in the Collective Consciousness of the Universe, and I happen to merely tune into it, at this particular moment, because my vibrational frequency, as of now, matches with it. This is the ‘tuning fork’ effect or entrainment. I don’t own these thoughts and these emotions, they are just passing through me, finding expression through me, just as a certain program finds expression through a certain TV channel at a certain time, if the TV is tuned into it. The TV doesn’t own that program. It doesn’t belong to the TV. The TV doesn’t feel guilty or euphoric about what is shown through it. We do, because we identify with whatever is expressed through us and take its ownership. 

What if we were to say, ‘The consciousness is expressing this particular aspect through me. It is neither good nor bad, it just is. And I happen to be the channel of this expression at this moment.” 

Will that be true acceptance and surrender or resignation and escape? 

Life is Simple

The question comes......What must we do for our parents? How must we look after them?....the answers are many....

However, another question, "What do we want our children to do for us?" puts everything in clear perspective......:)

I want my children to make me feel loved, needed, respected, cared for...........And this is exactly what I must do for my parent.....make her feel loved, needed, respected and cared for.......Simple...or is it???

And this is also what I must do for my divine parents- aka god...make him/her feel loved, needed, respected and cared for...:)))))))))))))))))

Do I want my children to worship me? Will I get angry and punish them if they don't? Do my earth parents want to be worshiped? Will they get angry and punish me if I don't? The answer is an emphatic NO..........so, what makes me think that my divine parents, named god by me, would want that???

Would I feel happy if my sons tell me, "You do such and such thing for me and then I may call or visit you at my own convenience?" Would my mother feel happy if I tell her so? The answer is an emphatic NO........so, what makes me think that my divine parents- gods- would feel happy with such a transaction???

Simple questions: profound answers..........simpler life.....happiness, joy, bliss, peace, ananda......♥